Do you like the hot new fad of cyber money, AND like it raw? Ooh baby, do we have the cryptocurrency for you! The estate of the late Wu-Tang Clan rapper Ol’ Dirty Bastard has announced the creation of a cryptocurrency called “Dirty Coin.” Fans can use “Dirty Coin” to buy Ol’ Dirty Bastard merch, or catch his hologram performing at future shows (the estate is working on that, perhaps to work again with Mariah Carey?). The digital currency will also be used somehow to benefit and promote the upcoming album from ODB’s son, who inevitably has taken on the awesome moniker of Young Dirty Bastard.
Now, we don’t know a damn thing about cryptocurrency, except that a GrubHub driver told us a few months ago that we should invest in Bitcoin as she dropped off our burritos. We didn’t think much of it, because, well, she worked for GrubHub, and BitCoin was already at some outrageous price, far from our burrito-feasting pay grade. The idea of cyber currency only makes us think of people needing to hide what they buy online. Which is to say that it’s just a way for people to buy porn and drugs online without their significant others being able to notice it on the monthly statement. We may be completely wrong, and things like “Dirty Coins” could be used for all sorts of above-the-board goods and services, but it really gels better if it’s to be used for nothing but the most enjoyable depraved filth and debauchery imaginable.
Because we’re talking about Dirt McGirt and money, it also brings to mind the time the rapper took a limo to cash a welfare check while he was being filmed by MTV, which made everyone in the ghetto cheer, and got conservatives and Clintons all kinds of pissed. Who knows what political ramifications ODB’s new cryptocurrency will have?
The advent of Dirty Coin got us thinking. What other former or current music personalities should start a cryptocurrency, and what should it be called? Put your answer in the post below, and if Popwell ever creates our own online cash, we’ll hook up the funniest answer with some.
Kanye could come out with Suck Bucks.