This week marks the 20th anniversary of the death of promising rapper Ice Kapaid. Kapaid was at the forefront of the popular Latvian ice-skating-meets-gangsta-rap genre known as skrapp. Moments after finishing the mix of what was to have been his debut single, Ice Kapaid ran out onto an ice rink to celebrate and was killed in a tragic Zamboni mishap.
Sadly, he was holding the only tape of his single, which was also crushed beneath the merciless Zamboni. The song was never heard again. Recently, the Kapaid estate released some of his effects, including a written copy of the lyrics to the song he was killed after recording. Here at Popwell, for the first time anywhere, are the lyrics to Ice Kapaid’s lost single, Kapaid in Full.
Kapaid in Full
They call me Kapaid, as in Kapaid in full
Baddest rapper on two skates, and that’s no bull
I’m cute like Manute in a pinstripe suit
Leavin’ skater haters in hot pursuit
When I say Ice I don’t mean jewels
I’m talkin’ ’bout frozen water, fool!
I’m so real I could never be phony
I keep things smooth like a fly Zamboni
Sport a fat skate around my neck
To keep you skate-hatin’ fools in check
I wear a funky spangled unitard
And treat ice-rink rules with disregard
I’ll make my mark—it’s a figure eight
And leave you in turmoil like a Balkan state
But you should never hold a grudge
Or I’ll downgrade your routine like a Russian judge
My favorite spin’s the Flying Camel
I got more gold medals than Dorothy Hamill
And more skills than Peggy Fleming—shit
If you were an indoor ice rink they’d be condemning it
They call me Kapaid, as in Kapaid in full
Baddest rapper on two skates, and that’s no bull
I’m cute like Manute in a pinstripe suit
Leavin’ skater haters in hot pursuit
Make way, make way for the rappin’ Dick Button
And hear DJ Boy Tano scratchin’ and cuttin’
We rock the party from here to Marin, bro
And keep your head spinnin’ like Rudy Galindo
Your ice is so soft it should be a swimming pool
And you’re a sloppier drunk than Oksana Baiul
I got more ho’s than Colonel Klink, sir
While you’re fingerin’ dykes like my man Hans Brinker
From Sonia Henie to Kristi Yamiguchi
I even made Michelle Kwan say “Hoochie coochie!”
When it comes to compulsory exercise
I do mine counterclockwise!
I remember the “Winter Games” tour of ’95. Ice Kapaid was headlining with $kull (who performed all his rhymes on his stomach. Kanye West has reluctantly acknowledged $kull as the inspiration for most of his stage show choreography), 4-person hip hop band “Lugeicrous”, and finally “Kurly” made famous by life-size solid-gold broom medallion.
The show, while still off the chain, fell well short of its potential with the absence of Kapaid.
Those are some wicked rhymes! What a shame to have lost such a talented figure just as he was on the verge of hitting the big time.